"Y'know, it really feels strange, knowing there are glottal stops in English. I thought they were only for, like, African bush language or something." "What are you talking about?"

"You know, those tribes out in—"

"No, about English."

"Oh, well, you know the way we pronounce words like 'mountain' or 'fountain.' We say 'moun' and then a little 'uhn.' That break in there is a glottal stop."

"So, it's kind of funny, but I've always meant to talk to you about the way you say those words."

"Huh?"

"Well, when you say them, you sound really weird. You skip a whole syllable."

"Mountain's a two-syllable word."

"See, just like that. When you say it, there's this weird gap—"

"Right, the glottal stop."

"Yeah, okay. But the rest of us say 'mountain.'"

"That is literally exactly how I say it."

"Can you really not hear the difference?"

"There is no difference!"

"That is so weird. Is it some neurological thing? Like, your brain just doesn't register the ___ sound."

"Because there is no — you're not making any sound!"

"It'd make sense that you never learned to pronounce it. Did you see a speech-language pathologist when you were young?"

"I'm leaving."